Your Personal Power in the word NO

"What you say no to, is as career-defining as what you say yes to."

An opportunity presents itself. Your first reaction is, NO. That reaction is your gut, your intuition, just a feeling…whatever term you want to use to label that initial instinct. Your instinct provides you with a signal, a mark in the road to help you choose the right path forward. But then the mind kicks in and tries to over-ride your instinct. It throws a whole bunch of ‘shoulds’ into the mix which at the root, are often entirely fear-based. You are left confused, as you battle a virtual game of table tennis, between your head and your heart.

I recently worked with a client in this very predicament. A job opportunity was presented, which from the outside made perfect sense to accept. It was what we’d label as a career opportunity; a chance to progress in the business. Despite being fully aware of her first reaction, a resounding ‘NO; this doesn’t align with my values’, they wavered and spent a week agonising over the decision. This is not uncommon, as the mind takes over with all the ‘shoulds’ and the ‘what will others think if I say no’.

Now for some in their careers, there will be a time where logically the ‘shoulds’ have to win out over what we find to be fulfilling work - you may be just starting out in your career, find yourself out of work and simply needing income, or having to take that stepping-stone because it is part of your larger plan. But for others, what you say NO to, is as career defining as what you say yes to. It also feels amazing to say no, once you practice, that is! It is empowering to own what it is that you want for your career. This means at times you are going to have to speak up and have those uncomfortable conversations and say no to opportunities that simply, don’t feel right. The great news is, that by saying NO to something, you are creating space for an opportunity that is more fulfilling and aligned with your ideal direction. So, start practicing following your gut instinct where it tells you NO. Start small and see how it feels.